


Dear Barry

by candicewestallen



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-27
Updated: 2018-07-27
Packaged: 2019-06-17 06:02:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15454926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/candicewestallen/pseuds/candicewestallen
Summary: A series of letters written by Iris West-Allen, starting on April 26, 2024.





	1. April 26, 2024

____________________________________________________________________________

_April 26, 2024_

_Dear Barry,_

_It’s crazy to think that you’re gone. You were just here yesterday, laying with me and holding me. When we were kids, I never could have imagined our lives turning out like this? I mean, who could? I don’t want to think that you’ve died. You haven’t. Right? This letter is a mess. All of them that I write will be. I don’t think I want to return to writing for the entire city._ _I only want to right for you now. T_ _he article about you vanishing will be my last one. I think I’ll just pour my passion and energy into these letters._

_I’m moving back in with my dad, Cecile, and Jenna. I can’t live in our home without you. When you went into the speed force, I at least got to say goodbye. Even if it was quick, I got to say goodbye. Why couldn’t you say goodbye to me again? You left me here alone. Again. This time, I won’t ever see you again and you didn’t even say goodbye._

_I don’t know what to do. Last time we didn’t have any type of funeral or memorial for you. I don’t know if we should this time. I don’t think I could go through that. I’m only 34 years old, Barry, I shouldn’t have to be going through losing my husband. I was supposed to spend my whole life with you. We were supposed to have a family. I just wish you’d come home._

_Please find your way home to me._

_Love, Iris_

  
______________________________________________________________________________

I set down my pen and folded the paper I had been writing on. I put it in an envelope and sighed before addressing the letter to Bartholomew Henry Allen at S.T.A.R. Labs. I grabbed a stamp from one of the drawers in my room and placed it on the envelope. I held the envelope close to me as tears began falling down my face. Why did this have to happen to us?

 

 


	2. May 2, 2024

_May  2, 2024_

 

_Dear Barry,_

_It has been exactly a week. I’ve been feeling quite ill and even more than before you left. So I went to the doctor and I really need you to find your way home now._

_You’re finally going to be a dad._

_You’ve wanted to be a dad for as long as you’ve known what it truly means to be a father. But I need you to be here. I can’t be a mom if you’re not here to be a dad. We were supposed to do this together. I can’t do it alone._

_I haven’t told anyone yet. You’re the first person I am telling. Or not telling because you’ll probably never get this and you will probably never get to see our baby grow up. You’ll never get to send our son or daughter off to school. And what if the baby is a speedster? I have Wally here to help with that, but that’s just not the same. It’s not enough._

_How am I supposed to be a good mom without you here? I don’t even know how to be a mom at all. I don’t even know what a mom is. I never got to have that. I never got to learn how to be a mother to my future children. OUR future children._

_I know I shouldn’t be angry with you, but I am. You should be here, Bartholomew. Our child should not be growing up without her father around. Barry, I don’t know what to do. I can’t do any of this alone._

_I am going to be a mother. It’s crazy to think about. There is a little tiny baby growing in my belly. I guess I at least have a part of you that I can keep forever. I can only pray that our baby doesn’t end up getting into as much danger as you. It’s one thing when it is your husband. Even though I just found out about the baby, I never want to lose it. I can no longer think about life without a child in it. I just wish you were in it too._

_Please come home to me._

 

_Love, Iris_


	3. June 1, 2024

_June 1, 2024_

 

_Dear Barry,_

_I haven’t written to you in almost a month now. I will try to write at least once a month, maybe two or three times. I just have a lot of preparing to do for the baby._

_I told my dad about the baby. I think he cried more than I did when finding out. He misses you a lot. Jenna misses you too. She’s really excited to be an aunt. Cecile_ _has been taking my dad to church a lot more. Every Wednesday evening, every Saturday evening, and every Sunday morning. We are all praying for you and for the healing of our entire family. But I don’t want to heal. I want you to come home._

_I’m your home, Barry. I am your wife. We have a child on the way. Well, actually. We have two children on the way. A boy and a girl. Barry, I need you more than ever right now. I am about six months away from the twins being born. They can’t grow up without you. They’ve started kicking and moving around. I wish you were here to see it. I never imagined my body could handle this. I’m not sure that I, myself, can handle this._

_You are supposed to be my hero, Bartholomew. That means being your kids’ hero as well. They need you. We all need you. The city needs you. I mean, sure we have Wally, but Cisco is hardly around. He’s not taking things very well. He and I still talk a lot. I asked him to be the godfather of our son. I’m not sure if what to name the twins. I kind of want to name them after you and your family, but maybe I kind of want to come up with something new._

_I miss you. I know I sound angry and upset with you in these letters, but at the end of the day I just love you and miss you and I want you to come home._

_Please come home to me._

 

_Love, Iris_

_____________________________________________________

 

I sighed and slipped the letter into an envelope as tears poured down my face. I got up, going over to my bedside table and grabbing one of the ultrasound pictures from my most recent appointment. I went back over to my desk and sat down with a sigh, wiping my tears away just for new ones to replace them. I slid the picture into the envelope and placed a stamp on it, yet again addressing the letter to S.T.A.R. Labs.


End file.
